It isn’t everyday we have a chance to sit back, relax, have a nice beverage and enjoy the beautiful beach before us.  In about a week; however, that will all change.  A black, hideous beast is about to beset and besiege our beautiful resort village.  No, it’s not Obama.  It’s worse, it’s the spawn of Obama, the BP oil spill.  The news gives word that this plague is about to wash ashore.  Already, the occasional strong breeze brings hints that something wicked cometh, and it smells like death.

Why should we worry?  FEMA and the Coast Guard are telling people to keep scheduling their trips, everything (for now) is fine, right?  Wrong.  I know what they’re not telling you.  That oil spill is spewing benzene, mercaptans, and hydrogen sulfide into the atmosphere at an alarming concentration.  Feel free to look those chemicals up.  They’re toxic.  They cause cancer, they dull the nervous system and hydrogen sulfide can even cause you to lose your sense of smell with sufficient exposure (just ask an experienced plumber).

The news in Britain laments the impact on pensioners not receiver their dividend checks.  Tough shit!  That’s business.  There is nothing guaranteed in this world.  When the company YOU OWN causes a catastrophe, YOU THE SHAREHOLDER should pay.  But Britain, being the merry socialists they are, will likely raise some scuttle over our treatment of their firm and the laws and liabilities and limits thereof.  They can just pound salt!  Have those pensioners come down here and take a whiff of this stinking breeze and ask them what they would do to an American company if the shoe were on the other foot.  Ha Ha.  You never thought about that now did you.  Those brits would raise such a stink we’d hear their whining in Marina Del Rey.

What about our dear Leader’s handling of this mess?  He is a worthless scumbag and should be forced to resign.